Week 7 - Diary Room

[Heather]

1/7/2015


_{Me when Danielle called me the fakest of them all.}

Danielle's exit was definitely uncomfortable for me.  I honestly wanted Danni to stay and I was so excited when it looked like she was going to... unfortunately things shifted at the last minute and I couldn't just blatantly go against what my closest ally was pushing for.  I always tried to be as genuine as I could be with Danni and it hurts that she was so quick to conclude that I had been dishonest with her all along.  If she did consider me her real Final Two then I feel awful but she was acting pretty shady at the end there... it was just so hard to trust her.

Right now it's the house against Ryan, but this isn't Vegas, and the house does not always win.  If Ryan wins Head of Household I'm definitely going on the block with Nicole... it's a lot of pressure and I'm trying to be optimistic but damn, the guy is good.

[Heather]

1/7/2015


_{Just getting comfortable in my nomination chair.}

Ryan is a god... that is all.

[Heather]

1/9/2015

Nicole and me being on the block sucks but as long as one of us comes off with Veto we should be okay.  I really want to win this Veto for myself, because just like winning Head of Household, saving yourself with the POV is like a Big Brother rite of passage.  It would be really cool to be able to secure myself a spot in the Final Five.  So far I'm the only person that's even beaten Ryan in one of these comps, so at least I have that going for me.  I just have to go out there today and do my best and not be concerned with how everyone else is performing.  If I get too caught up in the people around me, I know that I'll just psych myself out.


_{Today's song goes out to Shir Herman! Happy Quinceañera lady!}

[Heather]

1/9/2015



I'm so happy for Nicole!  She really killed that Veto and now there's a chance that both of us will be in the house next week!  Obviously a lot of it's gonna come down to who the replacement nominee is, but I don't think that I'm a dead woman walking just yet.

If I had to guess I'd say that it's gonna be Jess who goes up in Nicole's place, which is sad because I do love Jess, but in that scenario I'm guessing that I'd be safe?  I'd like to think that Donny and Jerry would both vote to keep me anyway.  I'm way stronger than Jess in comps so the likelihood of me helping them take down Ryan is significantly better.  I also have a deal to go to the Top Three with Jerry and Nicole and hopefully Jerry plans on honoring that.  I would think that Donny still feels some loyalty to Nicole and me as well.  He might be a little bit salty at Nic since she put him up as a pawn last week, but he really has no reason to distrust me personally... at least I hope not.

Also, while it might seem like Jerry needs to bring Donny or Jess to the finals if he wants a chance to win, I don't think that it's necessarily that cut and dry.  The jury definitely isn't too crazy about me and he has to realize that in a Final Two of him and I, if the jury is bitter they'll hands down give him the win.  He could easily get the votes of Danielle, Matt, Ryan and anyone that they try to poison against me, especially since Jerry hasn't played a bad game since he's been back.

[Heather]

1/10/2015


_{Stress eating, NBD.}

So Jess went up as expected and while I'm being told that I'm safe you can never be too sure in this game.  The minute that you get comfortable is usually the minute right before you get blindsided.  I know that Nic will keep me but I need at least one of Donny and Jerry's votes to secure my place in the Final Five.

Ryan is pushing hard to split up Nicole and me and while there are merits in splitting up an obvious pair, in my opinion that move really only benefits him at this point; it makes his path to victory that much easier.

Jerry is telling Nicole and me that he's evicting Jess and while I don't see why he'd lie to us, I don't want to assume anything right now either.  I was the only person who told Jerry the truth before he was evicted, sure, but the thought has certainly crossed my mind that he could still be out for some sort of twisted pre-jury revenge.  Could blindsiding me be his way of getting me back at me for the first week?  UGH.



I'm just praying that everyone is telling me the truth right now.

[Heather]

1/10/2015

Currently fighting for my life.  FUCK.